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Entitlement Issues?


PlanetaryGO
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I've noticed in many places around the internet, people getting upset because MCR (or certain members of the band) didn't come out after the show to meet fans. Yes, I understand how awesome and satisfying it is to meet someone you look up to, admire, appreciate, or feel like *knows* you in a way no one else does.

HOWEVER

Buying a ticket to a show entitles you to just that: a show. If you bought a ticket and the boys played a set, you've got what you've paid for. You don't pay for the experience of meeting the band, you pay for watching them perform their music live, in the flesh, in the same room as you are. That's it.

Let's debunk a few rumors/mindsets now:

1. You cannot pay to meet the band(if this has changed or is different for different countries/regions, please correct me). In some *very special* circumstances, people can in essence buy a meet and greet with the band, usually with proceeds going to a charity. In Kansas City, for instance, the top 3 people who donated the most canned food to Harvesters got an MCR M&G. So yes, you bought canned food which in essence, bought your M&G, but this was set up by the radio station (They also had a few different ways to win M&G too...they thought the canned food one would be good because it was right before Christmas and Harvesters was running out of food for the homeless). VIP passes, I believe, are either for the media or contest winners and I don't know if these even mean you get to meet the band, but have access to different areas. I know some places have skip the line passes that you pay extra for, but it is only meant for you to get into the venue before others.

2. "I've been a fan of the band for X amount of years and have done X, Y, and Z to support the band, I deserve to meet them". While I would honestly hope you'd get an opportunity to meet them, it's still not guaranteed. There's no system I know of in place at the moment that allows you to get M&G for doing promo for the band. While that would be super rad, it doesn't exist.

3. "They came out to meet fans at the show last night, that means they'll come out to meet us today". Again, not true. This one is usually the toughest pill to swallow because them coming out to sign or not contributes to MANY different factors.

-How far away is their next show and when do they play it? If they have a 10 hour drive and play the next night, your chances are automatically lower. If the next stop is 5 hours away and they have a day off, chances could be higher.

-Venue security. Venues dictate much of what happens with meeting a band. Some cities have curfews for minors I believe or some venues are located in rural areas very close to houses. I could see venue security wanting fans to leave earlier as to not disturb the public late at night. Please note: just because venue security say rude things to you, doesn't mean it's how the band feels towards their fans. Venue security sometimes lie to fans to get them to go away.

-Sickness/Injury/Exhaustion. For instance, at the Iowa show, everyone came out afterwards except Ray because he broke his foot the night before. Gerard wouldn't give anyone high fives because he was still sick. Frank tweeted the other day how he wanted to meet fans, but accidently fell asleep in his bunk. They're people too, who get sick, hurt, and tired. Sometimes you have to take care of yourself first.

-They're human. Humans sometimes need time to themselves, to go out and have fun. For instance, in Calgary, MCR had rented out an IMAX for everyone on the tour as a thank you. The band had to leave ASAP and not meet fans because they had to get to the IMAX in time. (I had this confirmed to me by Brandon of the Architects because I asked him about it). Wouldn't you want to be able to go out and have fun and give someone else a gift because you appreciate them? That's what MCR did.

4. "I bought them X gift or made them Y artwork, I need to give it to them". I can completely understand wanting to give the band something you bought or made them, I was in the same boat the other day! I made a Mikey drawing for Gerard since he asked for Mikey artwork via twitter and really wanted it to get to the band somehow. I had to think really hard to myself a few times "Can I be ok, even if I don't get my artwork to them?" and I told myself "While I'd really like to give it to them, I can be ok. Maybe I can get my artwork to them some other time or send it to them". Many people buy things for them or make them things, and while the intentions are nice, it doesn't mean you automatically get to meet them.

5. "I traveled X amount of hours and paid Y amount of dollars in gas, hotel, or airfare" Again, you only paid for a ticket. While I understand all the money you put into going to this concert, it still doesn't mean you will get to meet the band.

6. "I only got to meet X, but I really wanted to meet W, Y or Z more". I know people who would kill just to see the guys in concert, let alone meet 1 member of the band! I still haven't properly met Ray more than a quick handshake, and hopefully someday I'll get to talk to the man I highly respect. There's a good chance it will never happen. But still, I've been thankful for any contact I've ever gotten with any of the guys. I didn't deserve any of it.

7. "X rarely comes out to meet people, they must hate their fans". Who knows the exact reasons why they ever come out to meet people, but to deduce that they hate their fans is an assumption not based around any facts. If someone doesn't come out to meet you, please don't take it as a personal offense.

EDITED TO ADD:

8. "X was walking down the street with their security guard and the security said they weren't meeting fans, they must hate/not appreciate/etc their fans". At a Kansas City show I experienced this one. Right when I arrived at the venue, a member of the band was leaving the grocery store across the street with their security guard. I guess someone approached them and the security guard said the member was having personal time right now and wouldn't be meeting fans. A few people got upset about that, which I guess is understandable. But again, the guys are people too, and there is no reason they should feel like they have to walk around the city with their hoods up and sunglasses on just to have some personal time. It doesn't mean they don't want to meet you or they don't appreciate you, it means that they're hungry, wanted to do some shopping, and would like to go enjoy their purchases however they deem fit. It means they want the right that you and I have everyday, a right to a little bit of private time, even in a public setting. So please don't take personal offense to this.

EDITED TO ADD 2/4/12:

9. As to the band's request, please do not attempt to meet them at an airport or a hotel. The tweet from Frank addressing this can be found here: le click

I know how important it is to want to tell the band how much you appreciate them. An idea would be to communicate with other fans through the boards and ask them to print out a letter from you, if that person has a meet & greet or they will be attempting to meet the band after the show. Some people, such as ViennaKISS, have made threads on the boards asking for any letters from fans that she could give to the band since she had a M&G with them the next week.

While I hope every single MCR fan gets to meet them someday, I made this thread to reinforce that paying for a ticket doesn't mean you'll get to meet them. Please don't take it personally if they don't come out to meet you. Try to enjoy the fact that you got to see a show by one of your favorite bands. If you would like tips on how to meet the band, there are a few threads floating around here that could maybe help you do just that. Stay positive and good luck! :)

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Couldn't agree more. There is never guarantee the band will come out and you shouldn't get your hopes up because things don't always work out & in no way is it the band's fault.

Nobodies guaranteed to meet the band when they buy a ticket, but you are guaranteed to see a KICK ASS show!

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I love you.

While it would probably make my life to meet any one of the guys, I know that it's just not probable, and it's not their fault.

I really hate it when someone complains about the band not coming out. I know I'm lucky as hell to be able to see them live, and be as close as I have.

Why should we ask for more of them?

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I love you.

While it would probably make my life to meet any one of the guys, I know that it's just not probable, and it's not their fault.

I really hate it when someone complains about the band not coming out. I know I'm lucky as hell to be able to see them live, and be as close as I have.

Why should we ask for more of them?

Right. And it makes me afraid that if people get all upset and mouth off at the boys when they don't come out and twitter harass them or whatever, that they'll just stop coming out to meet people and only meet the M&G winners. I have no evidence that they'd do this, but it's a fear I have. I want as many people as possible to be able to meet them! When Gerard walked down the stairs to leave the venue at the Iowa show he said "We'll be right back!" to let us know he'd be signing, but I kept muttering to myself "Don't scare off the Pokemon" because just one or a couple of fans could make them change their minds.

That's another thing: If you see the guys and it looks like they ARE actually going to meet you...stay calm, thank your lucky stars, and do NOT scare them off! >_<!!!!!!

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I remember reading someone's show story a few years back.

They were patiently waiting after the show, and Gerard and Bob happened to come outside. All of the fans rushed over and pushed each other to get as close to the guys as possible.

According to her, Bob just said, "Fuck it." and they left. The girl never got to get anything signed, so of course she was pissed at the fans.

I hate it when people see a member and scream. Yeaah, THAT'S gonna make them come see you. Or when they're standing right in front of one of the guys and still scream. I mean, I know you're excited, but contain yourselves.

This is slightly off topic, but I also hate it when fans just screech throughout the whole show. Yes, it great at certain points, like when the band come out on stage. I think cheering shows them that they're appreciated and we're excited. But when they're in the middle of a quieter song, like Cancer or The World is Ugly, the screaming is unnecessary. It bothers other fans, and it probably bothers the band as well. I came to the show to hear the band, not your high pitched shrieks, thankyouverymuch.

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I agree with everything!!

I went to their show in Chicago, and only Ray and Frank came out. People got reallllly upset that Gerard didn't come out. But Ray was limping in his cast, and Frank looks really cold. I was just happy to see them. I think Gerard and Mikey didn't come out because 1. it was COLD 2. Security said if anyone takes a picture, the others won't come out. And as Frank was walkign towards the bus, 3 girls pulled out their cameras. and 3. People were screaming and singing. I know we were all excited, but the guys know the songs, they had just sang them for us less than an hour before. And we saw Gerard come out of the venue and go into the bus and all the girls were screaming "GERARD! GERARD!". Because he really wants to come towards a group of 50 screaming girls(and a few guys).

But if I could pay to meet them, I would.

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I agree with everything!!

I went to their show in Chicago, and only Ray and Frank came out. People got reallllly upset that Gerard didn't come out. But Ray was limping in his cast, and Frank looks really cold. I was just happy to see them. I think Gerard and Mikey didn't come out because 1. it was COLD 2. Security said if anyone takes a picture, the others won't come out. And as Frank was walkign towards the bus, 3 girls pulled out their cameras. and 3. People were screaming and singing. I know we were all excited, but the guys know the songs, they had just sang them for us less than an hour before. And we saw Gerard come out of the venue and go into the bus and all the girls were screaming "GERARD! GERARD!". Because he really wants to come towards a group of 50 screaming girls(and a few guys).

But if I could pay to meet them, I would.

O_O! See! It looks like a small group of fans ruined it for everyone else, which is so sad! Sorry you missed out on meeting Mikey and Gerard because of that! At the Iowa show, we were on the border of this security line tape. The security guard talked to us and gave us rules: If everyone doesn't line up in a single file line among the tape, they won't come out...no cameras, 1 thing signed only. They had only 20 minutes to try and sign things for everyone and there was probably 100-150 people lined up. People were very calm overall. When Ray walked down the stairs, with the help of a security guard since he broke his foot the night before, people cheered for him. Some people started chanting "RAY RAY RAY" and it gave me the motts. I'm all for cheering him on because of his injury I guess, but it started to worry me a bit! He did wave up at everyone in a very happy sort of way, like a champion who had just won a match. Ray didn't come and sign for us, but it seemed pretty obvious he needed some rest since he had just freshly broken his foot, which is 100% understandable. I just wanted him to feel better :)

But! Overall, all the rules were followed. No one shouted out at the guys, no one took pictures, everyone got their 1 thing signed, we all stood in single file. If we hadn't of done that, I'm sure they would've said "Sorry, you didn't listen, they aren't coming out." So yeah, part 2 of this thread is: Don't ruin a good thing!

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O_O! See! It looks like a small group of fans ruined it for everyone else, which is so sad! Sorry you missed out on meeting Mikey and Gerard because of that! At the Iowa show, we were on the border of this security line tape. The security guard talked to us and gave us rules: If everyone doesn't line up in a single file line among the tape, they won't come out...no cameras, 1 thing signed only. They had only 20 minutes to try and sign things for everyone and there was probably 100-150 people lined up. People were very calm overall. When Ray walked down the stairs, with the help of a security guard since he broke his foot the night before, people cheered for him. Some people started chanting "RAY RAY RAY" and it gave me the motts. I'm all for cheering him on because of his injury I guess, but it started to worry me a bit! He did wave up at everyone in a very happy sort of way, like a champion who had just won a match. Ray didn't come and sign for us, but it seemed pretty obvious he needed some rest since he had just freshly broken his foot, which is 100% understandable. I just wanted him to feel better :)

But! Overall, all the rules were followed. No one shouted out at the guys, no one took pictures, everyone got their 1 thing signed, we all stood in single file. If we hadn't of done that, I'm sure they would've said "Sorry, you didn't listen, they aren't coming out." So yeah, part 2 of this thread is: Don't ruin a good thing!

That has to be the largest crowd I've ever been in where anyone in a band came out and I've met a LOT of bands. We were extremely fortunate that night. That being said, it only takes an idiot or two in a group to ruin it for everyone. I started getting a little nervous when the chick next did the awful "I love you Gerard" a few times. I don't think he heard it, but it's usually those types who chase musicians away when they do try to come around.

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I've noticed in many places around the internet, people getting upset because MCR (or certain members of the band) didn't come out after the show to meet fans. Yes, I understand how awesome and satisfying it is to meet someone you look up to, admire, appreciate, or feel like *knows* you in a way no one else does.

This was incredible! Thank you so much for spreading the word, since I feel like this is very common logic

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This!

I've been waiting outside trying to meet a different band before and the same thing happen.

I explained to them why they didn't come over and they said i was a bitch because i was telling the truth.

People have to ruin it for everyone

Keep your cool or they won't come over

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Once again, let me re-hash how WONDERFUL this thread is! I'm going to the NYC show on Friday, and it was a very helpful reminder to *not* spazz out!

Honestly, I would love to meet them, but, more than anything, I want them to be happy and healthy. If that means no autographs/photographs/backflips, then I'll accept that. They spend so much time trying to make us happy, and I believe we should return the favor :)

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This!

I've been waiting outside trying to meet a different band before and the same thing happen.

I explained to them why they didn't come over and they said i was a bitch because i was telling the truth.

People have to ruin it for everyone

Keep your cool or they won't come over

Exactly. My first ever concert was Paramore in 2007. The buses were parked right infront of the venue because it's a smaller venue for our city and that's the only place bus vans can park. After the show, I really wanted to meet the band, but people were singing really loudly, yelling for them to come out, and pounding on the sides of the buses. Even back then, as a newbie concert-goer, I got the serious motts. It's not even an issue of where the buses have to park at that venue either! I've personally seen Cobra Starship, The Academy Is..., We the Kings, MSI, Forever the Sickest Kids, 100 Monkeys and probably a few other bands come out and meet fans before/after the shows because no one was freaking out on them! The band people even had to walk past the kids in the line and no one yelled and freaked out. We were chill and so chill in fact, some band guys would come hang out with us outside, such as Alex Saurez from Cobra. If you want bands to actually meet fans and not run away scared, you've got to be chill!

Once again, let me re-hash how WONDERFUL this thread is! I'm going to the NYC show on Friday, and it was a very helpful reminder to *not* spazz out!

Honestly, I would love to meet them, but, more than anything, I want them to be happy and healthy. If that means no autographs/photographs/backflips, then I'll accept that. They spend so much time trying to make us happy, and I believe we should return the favor :)

Great attitude! I sincerely hope you get the chance to meet even one of them next week! *crosses fingers for you*

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