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Lady_Godiva

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Posts posted by Lady_Godiva


  1. 36 minutes ago, SulfurSiren said:

    I am so glad to hear you had an amazing time at the wedding. The photo truly says it all! Nothing is going to stop you now Ash. I am proud that you feel so comfortable in your own skin and recovery to still share special moments in an environment with alcohol.

    Thank you, Rachel :wub: (don’t you just miss the wubs?)

    I’m so blessed that I have friends that knew my struggles and look out for me in tempting environments. I used to completely avoid situations with alcohol but as the years rolled by I realised it was stopping me being sociable so now I just prepare myself in any way I can. 

    The fact Queen was playing in this wedding party made it a lot easier ;) 

    • Like 2

  2. 21 minutes ago, Indifferent Ignorance said:

    Was this a wedding? I need context

    It was a wedding! I was pretty much the only sober person by the end of the night, but it didn’t stop me having a boogie. Mick, the guy in the wheelchair, said I made his night. Bless him. 

    The song we we were dancing to was Don’t Stop Me Now... 


  3. On 11/8/2019 at 1:39 PM, MajorSunshine said:

    I tried to multiqoute, but my phone didnt agree with me, so you got your own post Ash. Congrats with making the name official😃

    Thank you!! I'm glad it's official too. It makes all the legal things less stressy!

    This was a night last night, look at all that joy! dancing in THOSE shoes was difficult, let me tell ya

    yHRsrqH.jpg

    • Like 1

  4. Hi, I'm Ash. I've been around... too long man. I'm 25. He/Him pronouns. 

    My favourite album is Danger Days, though I do love The Black Parade for it's theatrical feeling, but Danger Days won my heart. I feel that's an unpopular opinion but that's okay.

    3 Facts:

    • i play guitar (i picked it up about 3 years ago)
    • i have a film degree
    • i recently turned vegetarian and it's pretty cool 

    Picture (sorry 'bout my face):

    4F6Xn0I.jpg

     

     

     

    • Like 4

  5. 3 minutes ago, NeverComingHome said:

    Hey Ash! Are you still going by that? Let me know haha I remember you too of course! 

     

    It feels so surreal to be back here, somewhere that was so integral to my life 8 years ago! And that the band is back!

    I’m still going by Ash. It’s actually my legal name now (as of 2018, I’m good at procrastinating...). Didn’t seem a big deal because I was already using the name for years!

    Feels surreal for me to be back too. I’d grown out of MCR since 2013, I’m probably going to be listening to the music in a totally different way. 

    • Like 1

  6. 11 minutes ago, Indifferent Ignorance said:

    'how's it going' really needs its own comment and I dunno if I have the energy this precise moment BUT I am also a writer! Prose mostly, but I'm doing a screenwriting class at community college at the moment, trying to figure out if I want to do a full time course in it or just stick with my current work and take classes. Would you mind if I maybe pick your brain some time?

    Also it is so refreshing to see where everyone is at in their lives. I feel like I'm at a school reunion but actually in a nice way.

    Feel free to pick my brain any time you want, any advice I can offer I’d be happy to give out! More than happy to look over your potential course details or talk over where you might want to go in the future. I found that very helpful when I started out. 

     

    (I also feel like I’m at a school reunion. It’s great.)

    • Like 1

  7. Okay, so this is my life update thingy.

    I still go by Ash/Ashley and I use he/him pronouns most of the time.

    So here's most of my story? Sam and I broke up amicably in late 2015, it was fine, no animosity or ill feeling, these things happen! Shortly after this happened I went on a "hey Ash, you gotta explore yourself" in terms of my career, my studies etc, so I took time out to figure out what I want to do - eventually I graduated with a film degree in 2017 (first class - who know I was that smart??) anyway, that was a surprise that I surpassed my own expectations. I got a part time job as a scriptwriter, which is a lot of fun, the people I work with have almost become my family, alongside this I work an office job to keep my bank topped up. It's okay - I don't think it will be forever, but it's okay, you know?

    In mid 2016, I met my ex fiancee, lets just refer to her as "my ex" for the purpose of this post - anyway, it kinda started off perfect, she was there to support me through my degree, and I supported her through her studies, and we just kinda gelled. I didn't expect to fall in love with a woman, but hey sexuality is a complicated area for me so lets not go there! Eventually I realised this relationship was abusive, in an emotional and physical sense. I won't go into detail and it's not needed and not appropriate, but it was the hardest thing I've probably ever faced. My health got so bad, that my hair physically started to fall out, I was having constant panic attacks and was generally on edge, and I sunk back into that dark place I thought I'd never get back out again. Eventually the police got involved, I refused to press charges. The turning point for me, was I was discussing with my therapist the start of this year, my ordeal, in full detail and its extent as well as my background and my former battles as well as victories.We were talking, and I had mentioned I felt like a failure, I felt like I'd go back to the place I always was as this teenager, but she replied "you have your sobriety" - and it hit me like a tonne of bricks. Through all the bad - I hadn't touched a drink. I have just celebrated 4 years sobriety and I couldn't be more proud of myself. In the darkness, came a light and positive. I held onto that to allow me to grow.

    Since the breakup in mid 2018, i've been back in that "Hey Ash, you gotta explore yourself" mindset and honestly, I've grown exponentially in the last year or so. I am, thankfully, much happier these days. The experience of hitting rock bottom emotionally allowed me to step back and view my life in a real raw sense, and since then I've decided to take my Masters degree and I've also been exploring my faith and beliefs. I'm positive about my future, albeit I'm not entirely sure what it looks like. Personally, my passion is in film and photography (does anyone want my instagram? I take pretty pictures),  But I have developed more passions. I would like to work with a charity at some point. My own experiences in life over the past 6 years (good and bad) - has led me to want to make a change. Do I stick with media or charitable work? I don't know, all I do know is the future is bright :)

    OH

    Before I forget...

    You all remember how Queen obsessed I was/am?

    I saw Queen last year.

    I'm seeing Queen twice next summer.

    Little 8 year old me would be so proud.

    I do miss my dear freddie

    i got a dog and called it freddie

    i also brought a replica red special (brian may guitar)

    and i learned to play the ukelele

    oh and i still own a black parade jacket

    • Like 1

  8. 56 minutes ago, SulfurSiren said:

    So happy to see you back! You were always a good friend to me and I have missed your presence. 

    This is sweet Rachel, thank you for your kind words. I do miss the good old days of the MCRmy, and your presence!

    On a serious note, I also found myself in a two year long abusive relationship from 2016 to mid 2018, hearing you broke it off and are now free from that situation makes my heart so happy for you. From my own experience, I know this is not easy for anyone to do. The humbling experience I had was that it made me appreciate my relationships with others much deeper, even just acquaintances on the street! I am so glad to hear your life is full of victories now, alongside such supportive friends and family.  Although we haven't spoken in a long time, it makes me so proud to hear that you have chosen to be on committees and commissions trying to improve the life of people with disabilities. I feel if we have a battle we have to face, we often want to help others that are also battling them, I think that shows a lot of depth and courage in a person. I always admired your drive growing up in the Sister Wives, and nothing's changed there! I am so happy thank the reunion will rekindle of the lost relationships and friendships I had with you guys, and that already has made me grateful - and that's without the music!

    Really looking forward to your MCR pics!

    I'll try to sum up my last 6 years in my next post (yikes)

    I still go by Ashley... not sure I mentioned that!

     

    • Like 1

  9. 1 hour ago, Indifferent Ignorance said:

    Heyyyyy! Are you still in film?? I am sort of reaching toward being in film. Congrats on your sobriety also, that's huge.

     

    Thank you!

    I work as a freelance scriptwriter and film editor alongside my “normal” job. Hoping to break into the industry full time! How’s it going for you?

    • Like 1

  10. 6 minutes ago, DNAdrain said:

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAH YOU'RE BACK! Hi I've missed you 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 all the best people are coming back this is the best

    Okay so my favorite had to be Osaka. It's Japan's second largest city (after Tokyo of course) and imo it's the perfect size. I love cities, I love entering a new one and feeling out the vibe. When a city is enormous, though, the vibe can be lost and you have to break it down to neighborhoods to feel their vibes. Osaka is not too big but it is complicated and fun! I loved just walking the streets, but also it's got some neat districts and fun things to do. I'd live there if I could 🤩 I am absolutely determined to go back someday and hopefully spend even more time there next time! 

    (lmao if anyone wants to see pictures I used my insta for that, @kateranoff)

    Guess. What I just did. I need somewhere to be excited about this. I just wrote my letter of resignation! I've had the kind of job that people quit as birthday gifts to themselves (true story) for over a year now. They've been pushing me to enter management because I'm good at shit and don't have a shitty attitude. They get paid a ton but you literally could not pay me enough to manage this place it's a shit hole. 

    Also I have a second job already, and it's a fucking dream job that I've been trying to get since I started since I entered the workforce. I'm a librarian! So I have this dream job, I'm full time in school, and then I had this second job that's been killing me....whenever I talk to my friends about all the shit I do their eyes get wide and they try to calmly explain that I don't need to do all this to myself. And they're right! It's taken me three months but I'm finally quitting. I am SO STOKED

    I MISSED YOU TOO (And I also dropped you a message on Facebook messenger) 

    I’m SO happy to hear everyone growing and being successful and ahhh, a few years can do so much can’t it?

    I AM ALSO STOKED FOR YOU. 

    • Like 1

  11. 2 minutes ago, MCR=love said:

    thank you <3 <3 


    omg we should DEFINITELY compare notes :D and have a proper catch up again sometime (wasn't I still in Aus last time we talked?) But yea, I mean, we're aiming to get married sometime within the next 5 years, so there's a bit of time to save up and plan it all ^^ and sounds like you're gonna have a blast at your wedding :D 

    aww yea that's right, education costs money for you guys :/ I hope you can afford it at some point :3 

    I'm sure your wedding will be a little more grandeur than mine, but that's okay! I believe so, back in November? You have a lot of time to plan and save, and with that amount of time I'm sure it won't be so stressful! I'm usually around on Facebook nowadays, at least on Messenger, so feel free to message me when you get the time!

    Yeah the UK isn't that great for education, especially post-graduate. I'm hoping to in a few years time. Getting my degree really did make me feel like I can be successful so I'm thinking why stop there?

    • Like 1

  12. 2 hours ago, MCR=love said:

    Hey hey :) just popping in to hear how everyone's doing :) I'm finishing my master thesis this MONTH DDDD: super stressful xD and as some of you may have seen on fb  or instagram, I got engaged this friday! I'm so excited :D and it's  so inconvenient in the middle of all the thesis work, it limits my ability to focus on doing my work because I keep drifting away and finding myself scrolling wedding websites etc xD 

    So yea, I'm doing pretty heckin good :D  

    I know I said this over Facebook but I'm so happy for you! :wub: I've found wedding planning stressful but if you have a lot of time it can be enjoyable, especially being creative and fun for example at the reception/party i am dressing as freddie mercury and dancing around for song because it's how i self indulge on my wedding day! The location we found to marry in is beautiful, we should compare notes sometime!

    Good luck with your masters thesis... I miss education! I'm still debating taking my masters but I don't have enough money at the moment :( 

    • Like 1

  13. Good luck with the interview Kerry! I hope everything works out for you. I totally understand the job related stress you're going through. 

    I had a Skype interview for a HR Digital Media role and then a follow up face-to-face interview today and I find out the outcome on Friday. It's so much work and preparation for a potential unsuccessful application. 

    My added stress is that I'm getting married in August. Unemployment sucks. 


  14. Definitely appreciating small achievements helps, i've been struggling to acknowledge them at times, it's tricky. I've been speaking about a disorder I have called Trichotillomania recently, it's certainly helped me feel less guilty.  You're right though, it's hard for people to understand, and of course, that often makes our anxieties worse.

    That's a good pseudonym but I want to completely avoid using my birth name if possible. I could use Ash/Ashley Mercury, but I've used that so many times -_- Pseudonym's are hard.


  15. Hey Kerry, I've had some anxiety issues recently too, to the point where I left my last job as I was having constant anxiety attacks, but I never talked about it online. I hope things improve for you. My recent anxiety stories go back all the way to May (Which is why I've been a bit incognito) now I'm medicated, though i still struggle with basic tasks due to anxiety, if you need someone to talk to my PMs should be open. Rachel does have a very valid point though, at least you called in that situation. 'I know I definitely couldn't have done that.

     

    I see Etsy has been talked about. I've explored the avenue of Etsy with selling my photography, but I found a site called Pixoto. Unfortunately I have to sell my photography under my birth name (which I still hate), until I can think of an ideal pseudonym, huh, still thinking on that one. Once I have a pseudonym I can change the URL. I don't just want to be "Mr Mercury" for everything. Sorry Freddie  Since I'm now unemployed and getting married next year, this is how I hope to make a bit of money, though I'm not sure if it's viable, in that, i'm not sure if any would sell at all, maybe I'm being pessimistic, I'm not sure... anyway. I would however like you guys to offer me feedback on my current portfolio, I know I'm just starting out! http://www.pixoto.com/jakemottram


  16. Hey Guys. Not sure if I posted about my degree and how my life's been going but...

    I graduated with a 1st Class degree in Film. It certainly surprised me because I could never have imagined getting a First, just because they're quite hard to achieve. Honestly I thought I was going to come away with a 2:2 or at best, a 2:1, but I managed to get 3% over the first class threshold. At my film premiere, just before I had received the results, my lecturer told me that I had got a First and I didn't believe him, although I never thought he'd lie to me, he had no reason to, it was just hard to wrap my head around it. My other lecturer then approached me and the first thing he said to me was that my dissertation had taught him a lot of things, which was quite the compliment. Although I knew my dissertation was good, I already saw that I got 75% which is very high, the compliment made me feel even better, but getting a First overall was beyond what my aspirations and goals were, it also means I could do my Masters degree at some point too, so getting a First opens doors for me. I'm happy.

    I recently had an interview as a media lecturer (literally a week after I found out my degree results) and although the interview went well and the feedback was mostly positive, I didn't get the job, but it was a learning experience. I realised how much I have grown. I've been harassing TV studios by sending them my CV every couple of days. One studio in Peterborough i think i've applied for separate jobs there about 10 times. They're probably sick of seeing my name, but hey, consistence is key, right?

    I hope you're all well, thought I'd check in and let you guys know how I've been doing. I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I'll try to check in more often ^_^

    • Upvote 1

  17. I'm doing good! Yeah three years has gone by so quickly. It's quite terrifying isn't it? Dissertation writing is the bane of my life though. Strange how most people doubted I'd go to university and I'm a month to graduating. It's nice to prove people wrong. 

    Trying to become more social though, I'm not doing great at the whole friends thing 

    How are you?


  18. I've redone my hair recently as well (pink and blue) and I've been thinking about doing Danger Days red. How's it turning out for you?

     

    Also congrats on meeting Frank! I couldn't afford to see Deathspells.  <_< Are you going to #Parade10???

     

    Pink and blue sounds super cute. I'm loving the red actually. I was a bit skeptical at first but I think it suits me. (here's what I currently look like http://imgur.com/a/QtctX )

     

    Death Spells were a lot better than I thought they'd be, I had a blast. I should know what #Parade10 is but I don't, is there a meet up or something for TBP 10th Anniversary? 


  19. Oh boy the last few weeks have been intense. I met Frank! Death Spells were so good live and I'm glad I saw them.

    Only downside to the concert was seeing a girl faint beside me and having to pick her up in my arms until security arrived. There was only one security guy at the barricade what's up with that?

    Also, I dyed my hair red. Finally. I kicked anxiety's ass and now I'm channelling the danger days vibe.

    • Upvote 1
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