Jump to content


  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


Everything posted by Dia

  1. Same. I haven't yet really figured out what I believe in terms of what "ghosts" are though. It's hard for me to say if they're just some kind of imprint on the environment (so not an actual thinking person that is doing things, but more like a physical memory of a person that affects the environment) or if they're actual sentient spirits. There's scientific evidence that supports the imprint in a magnetic field theory, and in terms of what I believe (I'm a Buddhist and Taoist), that doesn't conflict with it. Energy cannot be created or destroyed, so it only makes sense that when we die, whatever energy that was contained is dispersed. But it seems hard to be able to then say that whatever makes us "us," our soul or whatever you want to call it, can be preserved. It seems even harder to say that the entirety of it can still exist as if nothing really changes except for the loss of a physical form (i.e. traditional ghosts). Who knows though. I mean, I believe in reincarnation, but not in a literal simplistic manner (I don't think you die and then wake up a squirrel). It just goes back to conservation of energy, when our physical form cannot sustain itself any longer, it breaks down, and that energy has to go somewhere. And I suppose somehow it can retain tiny glimpses of memories of its past forms. I get deja vu a lot, have dreams that seem weird (just like random weird, nothing particularly interesting, so I don't even think about them) and then later they happen, and at times I feel like I was someone else or have some connection to something that I don't. So who knows. Time and space are both relative. Theoretically, there's no reason time moves "forward" instead of "backward." Similarly, there's no physical explanation for why time seems to move in a direction at all (we should technically be able to move through time in the same way we move through space). Our minds are just somehow limited to being able to perceive the full reality of whatever time and space actually are.
  2. That's pretty creepy not going to lie! I'm pretty sure there's a ghost in my apartment building. But he doesn't really do much, hasn't done anything scary, and seems to come and go. Things just randomly turn on or get knocked off shelves. And sometimes things go missing only to randomly appear back where they belong. Keith was looking for a specific book and asked me where it was. We have a huge book shelf (one of those Ikea 4x4 Expedits), and I organize the books by subject and then alphabetically by author's last name (I am incredibly OCD and organized). The bookshelf is made up of little square sections so it's really easy to find stuff (each section has like 16-20 books). Keith was looking for Heart of Darkness (by Joseph Conrad), which is supposed to be on the very top left square. So I told Keith and he said it wasn't there. So then I, assuming he's blind, looked there, but didn't find it. So I then searched through every single book on the entire bookshelf twice and couldn't find it. I also rechecked the square it was supposed to be in at least 4 or 5 times. I then concluded that he had to have taken it to work and left it there. Well, 20 minutes later, Keith was like "uh, Heart of Darkness is on the top left shelf," and sure enough, it was, in plain sight. You literally could not miss it. There is absolutely no way I didn't see it in the exact spot I was looking for it (again a pretty small square with only about 16 books on it). I swear, it had to have been moved and put back, but obviously neither Keith or I did it. Several times different Tolstoy books have been pulled out of the bookshelf (still on the shelf, but sticking halfway out). It happens several times and it's always the same few books (War and Peace and The Death of Ivan Ilyich). A few times my cat was randomly obsessed with War and Peace by Tolstoy. He would not stop sniffing it like it smelled like another animal or something and then started licking it. It was so weird, I have no idea what could have been on that book that seemed so appealing to him. On another occasion my 1920's Underwood typewriter flew off of the shelf it was on and landed across the room. It was pushed really far back on the shelf, nowhere near being able to fall off. Even weirder, it is surrounded by knick knacks and all kinds of stuff that are easily knocked over, yet none of them were touched/moved. It has so much stuff around it that it would literally have to be pulled out perfectly straight to not knock anything else down. Anyways, Keith blamed the cat, but he was on the other side of the room with me when it happened. A few weeks ago I saw a mason jar that was lying on it's side on my coffee table somehow turn right-side up. Like it literally just picked itself up on it's own. I kind of freaked out for a second, but again, since nothing actually scary has happened I let it go. My TV constantly turns on in the middle of the night. Like it probably happens once every week or so. And when it does, it will keep turning on several times throughout the night. I also just have a general feeling sometimes that someone is in the room watching me. It's not all the time, which makes me thinks the ghost wanders into other units in our building. And I don't feel worried/scared, I just feel like someone is there. So that also makes me think he's not really trying to fuck with us or anything. I'm pretty convinced he's a writer or just likes literature and is from the early 20th century considering: The Death of Ivan Ilyich (one of the books that keeps getting pulled out) was published in 1886 War and Peace (another one of the books that keeps getting pulled out) was published in 1869 Heart of Darkness was published in 1899 And my typewriter is an early 1920's era Underwood. Oh and I believe our building was built in 1928. I'm not sure what was here before that though.
  3. I saw Oblivion a few weeks ago and I definitely agree. I was surprised how good it was. Last Movie I Watched: Star Trek Into Darkness. SO good!
  4. Good luck! Bribe friends to help, that usually makes it a bit better. Moving always sucks, especially in the hot/humid southern summer, I've been there. The worst was when Keith and I had to move all of our stuff from Nashville to Brooklyn. We drove a U-Haul for 15-16 hours straight and when we got to NY they were having a crazy heat wave and the entire city was sold out of air conditioners (so much so that you couldn't even order an AC from Lowes, Home Depot, Etc online because they wouldn't send them to New York). I had to have my mom buy one in Vegas and mail it to me.
  5. Ohh I still have to see that! I'm seeing the midnight premiere of Star Trek tonight, pretty pumped about that! Sorry you're exhausted. Moving is always pretty miserable. How're things at Disney going?
  6. Thanks! I've been around, just not really posting over the last few weeks. Busy with exams and such I suppose. What's new?
  7. I've been avoiding the boards for whatever reason... Miss you guys though!
  8. Same. I have unlimited hosting on Bluehost where I host all my sites. :]
  9. Oh my god yes! I was thinking about this last night actually. The easiest way to do it would be if they'd allow us to transfer the hosting, but I doubt that'd happen. Also, I actually don't think they'll necessarily go down because WBR undoubtedly has an unlimited hosting account, so adding additional sites themselves wouldn't cost a thing, the only cost is for the domain. Even so, I think it'd be best to try to back up the boards asap and have a forum ready to launch if these ones are ever taken down. I've set up and run forums before, but it would really be ideal if they would give us access to the backups or just transfer the hosting altogether. Not sure who we should talk to about this. I can never get in touch with Tina.
  10. It's ok, I went through a point where I neglected them a bit. I didn't get really into TBP when it came out, and I was just starting college so from about fall of 2007 until 2010 I was on sort of an MCR break. I think I was just mostly caught up in new experiences and didn't have enough time to sit, write, and listen to music like I did in high school (I went to boarding school and had a lot of alone time, but then once college started, because I was on the varsity soccer team and we were always traveling, I barely had enough time to think). Anyways, then I grabbed Danger Days when it came out, and at first I was like what in god's name is going on with them. But the more I listened to it, the more I realized that despite being way more "pop" and "dance" oriented than their earlier records, it was actually insanely punk and just so them (i.e. punk isn't about a sound or genre or labels, it's about the sentiment, and it's pretty punk as fuck when you can put out a very upbeat poppy dance-ish record that's so subversive). Anyways, I fucking loved it, and it made me actually go back and give TBP a good listen (I never gave it too much of a chance because I was still content with Bullets and Three Cheers and I wasn't crazy about WTTBP when it first came out), and aside from still not being crazy about WTTBP, that album is, in my opinion, probably their best put together album (i.e. as a whole). Yea, I think there's got to be some significant reason why that goodbye is what we have so far. They may be dealing with a lot of stuff right now (especially considering the legal issues with the label and the likelihood of internal band turmoil being a factor). I mean, I have no doubt they're all bound by some kind of non-disclosure agreement right now. And maybe whatever brought them down is too upsetting and overshadowing all the good times for them to feel like they can write out a proper goodbye. Hell, maybe they aren't on good terms with one another and are letting things calm down so that they can actually write a goodbye together (rather than one of them just writing it and speaking for the whole group). Or it's possible that the statement wasn't made by them (which I think is most likely), and they're waiting until either they're allowed to say something or until they can say what they want to say on their own terms. In any case, I think it will come in time after the smoke clears and the dust settles.
  11. Yea, I wouldn't take it to mean anything, I really doubt they wrote it, and I have reason to believe there is a conflict with the label right now that's the real cause of the information block. And even if they did write it and are choosing not to say anything, I still wouldn't take it to mean they don't appreciate us. Basically, either they can't give the goodbye they really want to give and can't let us know what's up, or they are choosing not to and have their reasons. Whatever the reasoning is behind that post, I have no doubt they really care about and appreciate their fans. That's essentially what I was trying to say yesterday and people seemed to take it really personally and got all butthurt about it. You know, yea, some kind of elaborate "break up" and hoax is totally something they'd do, but that just isn't the case here. They're broken up, for all intents and purposes, for good. The lack of information (i.e. people not being able to talk about it just yet) is indicative that this is final. I have decent access to info, and when that source wasn't able to answer my questions several months ago, I knew what that meant. There's a reason they said it was over and didn't try to pass this off as a break or hiatus. People just completely misconstrued various statements saying they were "excited for their futures" as meaning they knew what those futures were and that the band was still together (when they didn't and were just wishing them well). It's fairly apparent that they all plan on continuing with music, just in various directions (though as we've seen, some of them will likely continue to collaborate). And it's really not impossible for them to reunite at some point in the (relatively distant) future, but it's not something I'd count on or sit around waiting for. Totally agree, this sounds like a great idea. I wrote up a pretty long recap of their very last show (Bamboozle, May 2012). You can check it out here. I knew there was a reason I paid for those overpriced Bamboozle tickets and took the train out to NJ... And I've probably posted this shot 100 times, but it's one of my favorite photos I've taken, and it was one of the first shows I ever shot. And along the lines of me being relatively defensive of them when fans were getting angry saying the band "owed" them more (really just when I was pointing out that they've given us a lot and have always been really dedicated to their fans), it's really just that even if they had just given me the music, they'd have given me a lot, but on top of that, they have always been so fucking cool to me when they didn't have to. I know some people in the past have said that they're really not nice and it's just an act for fans, but honestly, even if that's true, I really don't care. The fact that they make an effort to act nice and appreciative toward fans says a lot. I saw G at NYCC this past October and even though I was awkward (read quiet) and dumb, he was insanely nice. He could have easily said "cool ok bye" and blown me off (hell that's what I'd probably do after a certain point of never being able to be left alone), but instead he asked my name, and made an effort to actually converse with me. Whether he genuinely gave a shit or not really doesn't matter, because at the very least, he acted like he gave a shit, and I walked away feeling good. Oh and he signed my vinyl copy of Danger Days! I didn't even have to ask, and I mean, like I said, he could have just walked away, or just signed it and left, but instead he was totally personable, engaging, and nice. Maybe I give people too much credit because I'm an asshole, but like, I think the little things (like asking how to spell my name so he could make it out to me and driving conversation when I was being quiet/awkward) are really indicative of what a person is really like. I know they give a shit about their fans, regardless of that statement or whatever the hell is going on. This can't be said enough.
  12. Exactly what I've been trying to say all evening. I actually recently read an article in a medical journal about new genetic research that suggests that Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia, Autism, Depression, and ADHD were actually all just different physical manifestations of the same neurological disorder (caused by the same combinations of genes) that affects how our minds process information. It actually makes a lot of sense considering how much overlap there is between all of them. At times they can look quite similar to one another and they each vary wildly even within themselves (ex. even autism doesn't accurately describe a single disorder, and those affected vary from high-functioning individuals with personality quirks to those who's development is far more obstructed by it). This.
  13. I wouldn't say it makes me tired. It just doesn't affect your energy level in the same way it does for most people. Like, in the morning, I can't function without caffeine, and really need it to get going. But if I drink it at night, I can still go to bed without issue. I also lose focus and energy way worse in the late afternoon and early evening, so it might have to do with that. And with all that said, I have really bad insomnia and struggle to sleep on a normal sleep schedule. ADHD is really linked with sleep dissorders too, so it might have to do with that or it might have to do with the fact that ADHD meds can also cause insomnia (though I was an insomniac long before I started taking meds).
  14. Bleh, catching up for the last 2 weeks... Caffeine pills are neither speed nor narcotics. They're stimulants, so they do raise your heart rate, and a caffeine overdose could cause heart problems. The effect is actually cardiac arrest, not a heart attack. It's usually only dangerous for people with underlying conditions (i.e. when you hear those cases of kids drinking several energy drinks and going into cardiac arrest, almost all of them already had a heart condition). Narcotics are totally different and are not sold over the counter. Not only do you need a prescription, but you can only get one months supply at a time. They're also stimulants and can cause heart problems in the same way caffeine can (increased heart rate leading to cardiac arrest). It can also increase your blood pressure leading to stroke (again though, that's usually if you already have an underlying condition, namely high blood pressure). Drugs like adderall are essentially speed and is a narcotic (amphetamine salts, methamphetamine). It was heavily prescribed and even advertised in the 50's as a way to pick up your mood, have more energy, and help with weight loss (though it still required a doctor's prescription). It is also incredibly addictive, especially if abused. And obviously now it's primarily prescribed for ADHD, and a lot of people w/out ADHD (or a prescription) use it as a way to stay up late and as a study aid. I'm not sure how it actually affects people w/out ADHD, though from what I've seen, they end up getting way more hyper. Anyways, I have ADHD and take it regularly, and all it does for me is making me feel relatively normal and in the present. Otherwise I day dream, lose chunks of time, and go back and forth between feeling totally exhausted and cloudy and overly hyperactive and unable to focus because my thoughts take me in a million different directions. Also, in terms of herbal remedies, ginkgo biloba is supposed to help with mental function. Now this is an interesting one. Caffeine is actually really two-fold for me. I can't speak for all people with ADHD, but you are right in that it can completely knock me out. I can drink 4 shots of espresso and immediately go to sleep. Also, caffeine never makes me hyper. Withthatsaid, I cannot function in the morning without caffeine (and that was also true before I took mediation for my ADHD). Oh hey, I have white ink tattoos! What happa?! Not with MCR, but with the being disowned thing. You're not disowned to me :[ MCRmy is for fucking life.
  15. Well no worries, stressing about what could happen won't change things. Instead of worrying about the future, live more in the moment and try to have some fun. It's all about how you look at things. If I don't check myself I'd become the most stressed / worried person ever. I have crazy bad anxiety, so this is all just shit that's worked for me.
  16. When I get stressed with school and want to quit, I just step back and remember that whatever I'm stressed about won't matter in the long run. Just do what you can to get through it, and relax knowing that that's all you can do. Don't push yourself too hard. Do your work and study, but if you want to blow it off to do something or sleep through class every now and then, then let yourself. Seriously I did it all the time in undergrad. I used to freak before exams (I'm in law school and our finals are usually 4-5 hours long each and make up our entire grade for the semester), but I've just learned to not give a shit. It's not that I really don't care, but I've realized that worrying, stressing, and cramming isn't going to make a difference. So I'll study, but if I want to go do something, then I will. I'll try, but I won't kill myself or spend every minute in the library. If it's super nice out and my friends are doing something fun, I'll ditch class and relax. And for exams, I just go into it knowing whatever happens happens, and if I fail I fail, it won't be the end of the world (even though I know it can feel like it). A grade is just a grade. Whether you had an A average or C average or whether it took an extra year to graduate won't matter in 20 years. But a degree is really important and something to be proud of. I think you'd really regret quitting, so maybe try to just think about it differently? Whether or not you get through college / graduate will make a difference in your life. But failing a class or getting some shitty grades won't matter in the long run. So basically, try not to sweat grades, do what you can, and just let yourself relax / do what you need to do to finish. Undergrad is honestly so fun, and I know school can be stressful, but try to enjoy yourself because it's so much better than the real world. Are you stressed about anything specific, or just school in general?
  17. Damn this sounds so awesome! I love horror from a realistic perspective / where the monsters and heroes are regular people. That's one of the things I love about TWD. I'm liking Off Monsters, but also, I read that as Of Monsters at first, which then made me think of Of Monsters and Men or Of Mice and Monsters (obviously both are plays on Of Mice and Men, which seems really relevant for some of the themes you're dealing with). Good luck in the competition! I'd love to see this get made. Ha if you need any actors hmu :]
  18. Bleh. I need to go to sleep but I can't.
  19. Hmm that's a tough one. Showing that you can stick with something will definitely be a good asset for your resume, and will obviously be even more beneficial if you apply for another position at Disney. With that said though, I can definitely see why you'd want to quit. All in all though, May is not very far away, so I think sticking it out would be the best. I know it's not what you want to do, but if leaving early would negatively effect you, staying a few more months might be worth it. Ok this is kind of a tough one since you're probably leaving in a few months. The just got out of a long relationship excuse is honestly bullshit. It just goes back to guys being unsure of what they want. Relationships obviously entail a little bit of commitment and more energy to make it work, but if you want to be with some one, you really don't see those as drawbacks. I was in an awful and exhausting relationship for 2 years (he was jealous, controlling, emotionally abusive, and we lived together). All I wanted was to be free/single and away from him, but it wasn't that easy. Anyways, I actually met Keith (my fiance) while I was still dating my ex, and I instantly knew I wanted to be with him, and I broke up with my ex and started dating Keith w/in days of meeting him. It has nothing to do with being in a relationship or not. It has to do with being with the right person. Either way though, you're young, and relationships are way more confusing when you're trying to figure stuff out, especially with guys who are even more confused (they do tend to be a little more emotionally immature). Another reason I think Keith and I work out together so well is because he's a lot older than me and knew exactly what he wanted (i.e. there were no games between us, and we knew we'd get married w/in the first month or two of dating). I'd say just let things happen. You don't know where your'e going to be in a few months and I'm sure he doesn't either. If it's meant to be, it'll work itself out. So let it be something that makes you happy and enjoy whatever it becomes; don't let it be a source of unnecessary stress. Again though, I know it's way easier said than done, I always stressed about relationships (and actually, I feel like I kind of liked worrying about them, as weird as that sounds). Just do your thing though, you need to be happy on your own, so use your extra time and energy to find things you enjoy, make new friends, go to shows, work on your photography, etc. Thanksss! And I'll definitely be sharing photos! Aww thank you! I think you're spot on, it definitely feels very me. And yesyes, I promise, I'll most definitely post photos. Thank ya! And no problem at all. Getting the right dry shampoo really makes a big difference btw. I've hated some of the ones I've used, and a few have been ok, but they all had drawbacks (either too powdery or weird smelling), until I found the TIGI ones, which are perfect! And yea, sea salt sprays are a life saver, especially for bangs and layers. Ok, there's a few things about this kind of stuff. I'll say right off the bat, long distance sucks, it's not fun, and it ends up causing a lot more problems. Even the strongest relationships can be brought down by distance. When you don't get to see someone and then throw in jealousy, lack of time, separate lives, etc. it just turns into a big mess. With that said, if you really want to stay with him, try to make it work. Don't sabotage it beforehand because you're second guessing yourself. Decide whether or not it's what you want, and if it is what you want, try to make it work. If it's definitely what you want, you can also talk to him and explain that you've thought a lot about it, and you know it's a risk, but that you really want this and want to make it work. Assure him you're not trying to hurt him, and that your'e committed to making it work. If he wants to give it a go and make it work too, then there you go. If he's still unsure, you probably should just give him time and do your own thing. Also, I will say, when I've felt wishy washy about some one, it's because I liked them and cared about them, but I wasn't crazy about them, and I was more attached than in love. Just listen to your heart, and like I said, if you really think about it and decide it's what you want, then go for it. And seriously, no worries, nothing is wrong with you at all! This is all totally normal stuff.
  20. Well, even the best jobs can (and will) suck (at the very least from time to time). I had a job where, for most of the day, I literally just got to sit around, watch tv, drink beer, and hang out with my friends, yet there was still stuff I hated about it (I was a bike mechanic and we weren't terribly busy, but I got real sick of fixing the same stuff all the time, constantly banging my hands up, and sexist dudes coming in and first assuming I didn't work there, then assuming I was just a sales girl, then questioning whether I was really a mechanic, and the real assholes would ask if my boss/head mechanic was there, to which I'd have to explain that I was the boss and that they could now gtfo). Anyways, it just comes down to weighing the pros and cons. If it's really affecting your happiness, maybe the perks aren't worth it. I don't know the details, but is it something that will put you in a better position for what you want to do later on? Or is this just a temporary way to make money / do something? I'd write down all the benefits + factor in how important it is for your future and then determine if that's really worth all the unhappiness it's causing you. As far as boys go, I know it's easier said than done, but you can't worry about whether he'll text you or what he's thinking. Clearly I don't know the situation, but if you haven't officially decided you're dating / haven't stated that you're exclusive and put labels on the relationship, I'd try as hard as you could to occupy yourself with other stuff, have fun, and keep your mind off of it. Assuming there's something going on between you two, if he doesn't say he wants to be your boyfriend, then he's fucking up. He should be the one worrying about what you're up to. Just be happy on your own, go out with friends, have fun, and let whatever happen happen (i.e. don't worry about what the relationship is or is not and just let it unfold organically). Again, I know it's way easier said than done (believe me, I could barely take my own advice), but anytime I worried over what a guy was thinking, what he wanted, what he thought our relationship was, or whether he really liked me, it never ended up working out. Sure we may have done that kind of confusing back and forth for a while, but it'd eventually end. Guys play games because they don't know what they want, and until they figure it out, they're not worth getting hurt over. Anyways, if he does really want to put a label on the relationship, and he sees that you can be happy doing your own thing (i.e. aren't staying up wondering about him), he'll step up to move things forward. Most likely though, he's just busy with fam stuff / caught up in home life, I wouldn't read into it. So just distract yourself in the meantime and don't let it get to you. Again, I don't know the specifics, so it's hard to say for sure, and I'm guessing it could be a more complicated situation.
  21. Yea I think the key to growing it out is actually trimming it more regularly
  22. I got a hold of the two Black Parade 7" singles, so you can take those down for me. Thanks again! Remove (Found/No Longer Need) Welcome to the Black Parade (B Side - Welcome To The Black Parade Live) 7" Vinyl Picture Disc Welcome to the Black Parade (B Side - Heaven Help Us) 7" Vinyl Picture Disc Also just going to say again how badass this thread is! I was looking for the LTD color version of Danger Days forever to no avail. I then remembered this thread, and sure enough it was there! So pumped about it!
  • Create New...